my Beloved

God takes car rides with me a lot.  I was driving back to school yesterday after a long and tiresome but amazing D-Now.  My awesome sister had just made me six brand new CDs and she gave me a pearl bracelet that she didn't want anymore.  Which if you don't know my sister, we have almost the exact same taste in music, except the fact that she is cooler than me.  Anyway, listening to the awesome music, I felt really sleepy.  So, in order to stay awake, I put it on something that I could sing to.  So, since Haley's CD's were new, I switched over to my Ipod.  Brett Younker was on and he has some pretty cool songs.  The first one was "Nothing But the Blood of Jesus" so I'm jamming out to this song, singing loud, so that I won't fall asleep, and hearing some truths at the same time.  "This is all my hope and peace..This is all my righteousness, nothing but the blood..." remembering in Isaiah, that my own righteousness is like filthy rags, so the fact that I'm seen as righteous in His eyes, is because of His blood! After a while, I feel awake and I'm ready to turn it back to the awesome music my sister gave me.  Then I started to feel sleepy again (the music was NOT boring).. Then, for some reason I began to rethink the difference between secular music and Christian music.  I have always been a fan of both.  Not necessarily what I hear on KLove, but finding on my own the Christian artists that meet my taste in music.  So Im driving and thinking, what is profitable through listening to secular music? I've always thought, well as long as it's not bringing me down in my faith, then it's ok.  But I still couldn't stop questioning whether or not it is profitable? We are on Earth for no other reason than for Jesus, to bring Him glory.  So I kept thinking, is this for Him?  At that exact moment, I just let my thoughts chill, and started listening to the song that was already playing and it was a song by City and Colour called "The Girl"

I wish I could do better by you, 

'cause that's what you deserve

You sacrifice so much of your life

In order for this to work.

While I'm off chasing my own dreams

Sailing around the world

Please know that I'm yours to keep

My beautiful girl

When you cry a piece of my heart dies

Knowing that I may have been the cause

If you were to leave

Fulfill someone else's dreams

I think I might totally be lost

You don't ask for no diamond rings no delicate string of pearls

That's why I wrote this song to sing

My beautiful girl

so after the first couple of lines, I thought, could this relate to me and God? Then, after the next few I thought, no, it can't.  I told myself to stop trying to make a secular song fit the framework of my relationship with Christ.  Then I made a right turn headed towards Starkville right at the line where is says "you don't as for no diamond ring, no delicate string of pearls, that's why I wrote this song to sing, my beautiful girl." At this moment, the bracelet Haley gave me fell forward to where I saw it.  After that, I could not stop smiling, knowing that God had just told me that I am His beautiful girl. 

I feel sorry for those who believe in coincidences, because for me, it's moments like these that strengthen my faith like none other.  

Just like in Hosea, when I was young He called me out of the wilderness, and has been calling me out of it ever since then.  He has always held my heart with healing hands, even when I gave it away, again and again.  I am my Beloved's and my Beloved is mine.